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Sadly, I am not the sister accredited to the quote Amanda cites in this blog. But I do believe I should receive honorable mention for keeping that quote alive. Nonetheless, I love each of the stories Amanda shares in this blog that so accurately embody what one sister or other other said years ago. I am left thinking of all the tiny compartments that make up this bigger, good life...
- Christina
Read MoreI took a long walk this morning with my dogs to a state park near my house. The gravel trail winds in and out of trees adjacent to the hudson river. I've walked these very same steps in the past with many different loved ones who have come and gone. I’ve had picnics in the field with friends who have now moved away. I’ve done yoga near the weeping willow tree as my old dog who has since passed laid in the shade. On one of the benches facing the river, I shared a first date with someone who would later become my world. On another bench a bit further down, I wrote my dad's eulogy.
Read MoreLately, I've been trying to become more comfortable with being alone. It’s something I’m not particularly good at nor fond of. I've been fortunate to have amazing friends, caring sisters, trusting roommates and incredible significant others to walk through life with for many seasons at a time. I've had the privilege of being in lines of work that have allowed me plenty of opportunity to work directly alongside others as a close team. I've always loved to feel the joy that is togetherness. Though there is so much value in experiencing that solidarity, I've also come to realize the importance of making time to be alone, too. And I don't just mean the literal part of being alone that is doing things without the presence of others. I mean truly finding the time and space to acknowledge introspective thoughts and find the connection with oneself on a deeper, soul-level. I've noticed lately how seldom I actually get to that place, as I am usually trying to "make the most" of my time throughout each of the days to the point that even if I am technically by myself, I don't feel it because I am still looking outward to my environment for some external escape or interest and attaching myself to that.
Read MoreAfter recently reading two pieces on deep listening written by someone in the community, I noticed a key theme in both: "Listening for what is being communicated but isn't being said." Then I thought more about what it looks like when I've felt someone do this well in my own life.
It took me back to a moment this summer, when I sat across the dinner table from a person I had only recently met. As we sipped our drinks waiting for the food to arrive, I started casually talking about work from the last week and some projects I’d been focusing on. But it took me by surprise when he looked me in the eyes, changed the topic and said, “So I just wanted to check in with you. When we had been messaging last week, I sensed something was bothering you, but I knew you weren’t ready to talk about it. I wanted to see if you were still in that headspace or if whatever it was wasn’t bleeding into this week. Did you want to talk about it?”
Read MoreDuring my sophomore year of college, I took a creative writing course that helped me grow on various levels. Throughout my schooling, I had always felt confident in the subject area of writing, but the professor I had shattered that confidence the first month of the semester... in a great and perhaps necessary way.
Read MoreI've written many blogs and journal entries about my dad. A lot of these have been a form of grieving, or perhaps an effort to keep his energy alive, or simply to serve as memoirs of who he was.
It struck me one night that losing my dad has given me reasons to write about him - reasons I don’t have for my mom, because she is still here. And in that same thought I felt compelled by different reasons to write about my mom - a person who has very much influenced my life and the person I’ve become. To take time to reflect, to express gratitude, and to serve as an acknowledgement of who she is while I have the opportunity to do so.
Read MoreMy boyfriend Oscar and I joined a soccer team a year ago with a group of about 25 other guys, and now we play pick-up every Sunday morning. Over time, I became close with a few players on the team. I was grateful for these new friendships. Not only did we share many talks and laughs throughout the games, but sharing conversation over cold beers at the local brewery in town post-game became part of our Sunday routine.
Read MoreToday is a landmark for the CFC Writing Circle which started about five years ago.
I would like to express that with each passing year, I've felt it become a more prominent part of my life - It has truly brought me so much joy and inspiration reading others' writing pieces throughout the years. And it has also given me this creative platform to share my own words in an intimate and safe space where I can also commit to deeper reflection on the events that take place in my life, both big and small.
Read MoreI was fortunate to spend the month of March in the beautiful island country of Sri Lanka. As I finished up packing and closed out work for the week, I kept hearing similar things from those I shared my travel plans with.
“Always carry either a pocket knife or mace.” "Pack a flashlight and shine it in their eyes if someone tries to approach you.” “Make sure your money is always stored in different areas.”
Read MoreThe last time I spoke with my dad he was leaving for a trip to Nevada. Two days later, while driving on a winding road back from the Hoover Dam, he crashed his motorcycle and was gone.
Clara, the main character in a book I'm reading, experienced the unexpected death of a parent too. She revealed that as close as she was with her father, she had forgotten many memories of him and what it felt like to be in his presence. So later on in the book, when her boyfriend tells her that his grandfather is battling cancer and has only a few months to live, she recommends he start writing down the things he loves about him, the sayings he had, the things he’d do, and anything he'd want to remember and cherish forever. She wished she had done so before her loss.
Read MoreI had a last minute cancellation in a work agenda a few months back on a sunny Monday afternoon. Naturally, my next thought was: "Okay, now how can I fill that time? What should I get a head start on?"
I reluctantly pulled out my laptop and stared at my screen. I felt drained on this particular summer afternoon. But it was only 2pm, so I knew I needed to move past that feeling and not waste time. I had so much that still needed doing, and this was an opportunity to get it done.
But then I took a breath and sat still with my thoughts for a few seconds.
Read MoreBack in grade school, I enjoyed learning and getting creative with the element of symbolism. I liked when my English teacher asked us to think more deeply about what was revealed in the actions of characters inside our books, or in their names, or in the colors in story settings. I now find myself often seeking the deeper, sometimes hidden meaning of things beyond books and inside my everyday life. I see the stars above representing peace and wonder, a tree bark tangled in vines illustrating resilience, a freshly-filled morning coffee mug embodying warmth, richness, and possibility for the day ahead.
Maybe I try to believe there may be an added element of beauty or magic in certain things even if it’s not immediately apparent. It may just take looking a bit closer at the way simple occurrences or even mundane objects present themselves. Because at times, a new revelation could bloom from them.
So this week’s symbol that portrayed itself was found in my plant (fun fact: it was a gift from Pip). When I received it in the mail, it was just a little seedling. But now after three years, lots of Florida sunshine, and a very long road trip, it has settled here in New York with me.
Read MoreSomeone recently asked me what I learned about humans in the last year. Maybe my response wasn’t something I necessarily “learned,” but it was something I more so felt about people and our existence side by side one another.
I said how, despite us needing to stay physically apart the last eight months, and having to tighten up a mask and go out of our way to ensure we don’t cross paths with someone, ironically I’ve actually somehow felt a huge sense of togetherness. Not just in fighting this pandemic, but in getting through the little challenges and finding ways to help one another make life a bit brighter. Together.
Read MoreBack in college, whenever I was most overloaded with coursework, it was no question where I’d go to tackle it. Most of my friends would head straight to the library. Instead, when I was swamped, I went to the swamp.
On many stress-induced occasions, I loaded up my backpack, picked up an iced-coffee, and headed to this very spot on campus. There was a table beside a small pond surrounded by cabbage palms, live oaks, and the sounds of lively warblers and murmuring toads.
My fellow students used to turn to me and ask, “How do you not get totally distracted there?”
Read MoreIn a conversation with Srin Sridharan today during a breakout session of our Reflections Call, I mentioned how I’ve always been more of a writer rather than a speaker. Writing comes much easier to me than openly speaking does. Public speaking is actually one of my worst fears. And it’s most likely because I get caught up in my head and my own ideas and then freeze up or feel myself being pulled into a ridiculous internal tangent. Writing, on the other hand, gives me the time and headspace needed to reflect and collect my thoughts and articulate them how I actually intend. At the end of our conversation, Srin mentioned that writing and journaling could be used as a tool to crystallize one’s thoughts.
Read MoreThe only thing better than my internship this past year was the person who led it. It has been over a month now, and I still find myself unable to process the tragic and unexpected passing of Mr. B - a person with an extraordinary soul, who inspired me since the first day I saw his radiant smile.
The internship that I spontaneously decided to take on last semester was geared towards harnessing the therapeutic healing power of nature to support young adults with disabilities. My three co-interns and I planned an engaging activity at a different nature park once per week. The internship/program we were leading was titled Nature and Nurture and partnered with another incredible agency titled, “Life Transition Skills” (LTS). LTS has the “aim of developing and empowering youth & young adults with intellectual differences in achieving their full physical, emotional, intellectual, social, and spiritual potential, as individuals, and as independent, responsible citizens and members of their local communities” (LTS, 2017). The program is incredible because of its leader.
Read MoreI’ve had some rough days the last month - where I get home from my internship and unlock my door and just lay flat in bed, being weighed down by heavy thoughts and feelings that float around in my head as it rests on the pillow.
The last month was my first month of graduate school. “It’s just the work load,” I’d repeat to myself each day after taking off my backpack and intern clothes. “I just have a lot on my plate so I’m stressed. Tomorrow will be better.”
Read MoreHi all, and Happy New Year! We are resending the anti pet peeve list in case you missed it from a week ago. I wish you all joy, positivity, and meaningful change for 2019!
Read MoreFor the last six months, I have been meeting with an amazing life coach in-training via zoom every other week. During our last call, I communicated to her that, lately, I have been so stressed and overwhelmed that I have actively noticed myself getting more easily frustrated or upset over minor things that occur in my life on a daily basis. I told her that I had been feeling hypersensitive to trivial negative incidences… like when I got to Dunkin’ Donuts and realized I had forgotten my reusable plastic straw.. or when a driver didn't let me cross in the crosswalk.. and safe to say, I did not like this realization I was having.
Read MoreThis past Monday started as a typical one — backpack heavy and coffee hot. I left for class right on time, descended the flight of steps from my apartment, and stepped into the parking lot. To my joyful surprise, there was this little dog there. So of course, my immediate reaction was to call to the scraggly little pooch. And immediately he trotted over to me and let me pet him. His wiry hair felt really coarse and he honestly smelt like he had just been in the dumpster across the street.
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