#284: 10 THOUGHTS on Gratitude-Meets-Process

A couple groups of people (approximately 35 in all) in the Community for Change we have all been nurturing, gathered to explore what “Gratitude-meets-Process” looks like.  These were some of the thoughts that I pulled from the discussions.   I list all of these as “thoughts” as in “thoughts that arose from our exploration”.   They are thoughts.  They are not meant to be truisms because they aren’t!  You can decide if any of these ideas quickly resonate or if you might want a deeper sense of how these ideas surfaced so you can explore more If you might wish…

You might also perhaps be interested in the podcasts Brynne released last week that included perhaps 10-12 of the voices from the group directly from our collaboration.  Yell if you might like that link forwarded. 

Cheers!

- Pip

10 Thoughts on Gratitude-Meets-Process

THOUGHT #1                      Gratitude is a value-finding perspective.   We are truly grateful for elements that contribute significant value.

THOUGHT #2                      Gratitude is for something that came from outside of us and as such necessarily requires vulnerability and a sense of dependence or interdependence;  If someone takes being a “self-made                                        person” to an extreme they would be unable to experience the vulnerability required for gratitude. 

THOUGHT #3                      WATCH OUT – Gratitude is transcendent (non-linear) and the value of gratitude can be completely lost if it devolves into a transaction.  What this devolved state might look like might be, “Since you gave me two units of a great thing X, I will give you two units of thanks in return.”    The trendiness in “reciprocity” undercuts the transcendence of gratitude.

THOUGHT #4                      Focusing on small specific detailed gratitudes (or what we sometimes call “anti pet peeves”) can reset the orientation of the mind swiftly.

THOUGHT #5                      WATCH OUT – It is dangerous/undermining to insert words such as “should be… grateful” ---  gratitude can’t be forced or compelled or demanded and when attempts are made from others or self-inflicted to “BE” grateful we tap into guilt, shame.    A value seeking orientation (gratitude) turns negative immediately.    POLICY:  I will never ask another to BE grateful.

THOUGHT #6                      WATCH OUT – gratitude can’t involve comparison but, rather, involves seeing for example “beauty” in the moment;  Comparison requires the existence of the “other” who is “worse off” in light of this devolved form of “gratitude” – in other words, gratitude coming from comparison would necessitate us being grateful that others are suffering.

THOUGHT #7                      WATCH OUT –  Sometimes gratitude is employed (consciously or subconsciously) in the process of controlling or in dictating a hierarchy (e.g. parents to children; religion; employment).

THOUGHT #8                      Gratitude is a MEANS not an end;   Gratitude leads to generative mindset while its opposite leads to extraction mindset. 

THOUGHT #9                      Gratitude is a muscle to develop through repetition and must overcome the human condition/training toward critical/blaming mind.

THOUGHT #10                   Gratitude and fear can not exist in the same moment.