#302: I Don't Need to Be Happy

I wrote a blog a few years ago where I shared some of the greatest words of support I received from a friend after my dad passed, which was advice to be anything BUT strong. Instead, to feel all the emotions and let them come and go freely. My sister's blog below reminds me of the importance of embracing the notion that feelings come in waves, and the value of allowing them to do so without judgement and without putting pressure on striving to feel the positive ones all the time.

- Amanda

I Don't Need to Be Happy

I've learned that the pursuit of happiness actually leads to unhappiness.

Why? Because it's an unrealistic expectation. Happiness is a fleeting emotion. And therefore it's actually impossible to live in a state of perpetual happiness. Yet sometimes it feels there is pressure to. But I know I can't constantly be smiling, laughing, or always thinking positive thoughts. 

In fact, the people who live the most fulfilling, meaningful lives, experience a range of emotions. And these people realize that living in a state of contentment, and satisfaction with one's life is way more important than just "feeling happy" all the time.

A meaningful life is wayyyy more important than a happy one.

Life includes "all of it." The good, bad, and the ugly. I've realized accepting that fact is key. 

I learned this lesson 6 years ago when my dad died in a motorcycle accident. I certainly wasn't experiencing a sense of HAPPINESS very often. However, I tried my best to allow and accept anything and everything I was feeling. And I focused on feeling everything fully. Not pushing any of it away, or trying to deny those feelings. 

And afterward, I learned a lottttt about myself, my dad, and my life. I found a deeper meaning in all of it and I know I am better because of it.

No one is happy all the time. And we are all doing the best we can. 

So as it's mental health awareness month, I'm using this time to take some pressure off myself to "be happy".

Instead, I'm focusing on BEING other things. Or maybe just BEING in general.

Being sad. Being overwhelmed. Being afraid. Being present. Being content. Being accepting. Being curious. 

I'm telling  people how I REALLY feel. I'm getting more off my chest. I am trying to fully feel my feelings. Not dull them, instead own them and accept them if I want to be free of them.

Even if I only do that, it's enough. 

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Take care of yourself.

Love,

Danielle